Category Archives: Songs

I Love You, Norman Reedus

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I know many of you are going, “Who the hell is Norman Reedus?”. Well, let me explain. It begins with Lady Gaga. I absolutely love her new video for the song “Judas”. I don’t want to deny this fact anymore. Well, I haven’t really been denying, it’s just that I don’t come across as an awesome bro badass who also happens to watch Lady Gaga videos. Now you know, you can be both. Okay, so, Judas, woah, I just love that shit, okay? If you’re not familiar with the video I suggest you go watch it now. Yeah, the song is catchy, yeah, Lady Gaga looks like a bad ass biker chick, but there was something else, something hidden that has kept drawing me back to this video time and time again. I didn’t know what it was… until now.

It’s this guy:

Now most of you know this sexy guy from the cult flick “The Boondock Saints”. Yeah, I saw it once, whatever. It was okay. It’s totally unrelated. I didn’t even realize that he played that Irish douche. What did come into my head when I saw him in the video, was the words”complete and utter badass”. I finally realized that I kept watching this music video just to see this guy. He’s only in the thing for like 33 seconds, but shit man, him in his tight leather jacket, with that rugged “Come get some!” attitude. His “I’m a fucking pimp” face. Holy shit. Holy shit… I don’t even know what to say, it’s just that I had to put this down somewhere. I love this guy. His name is Norman Reedus. And he is a complete and utter badass. Wow. Wow. Wow.

-Maxim

P.S. You can still be a bro and confess you’re love for an awesome dude. Stop being a douche.

The World Will End

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In my previous post I mentioned something about some sort of something song that I wrote. Well, even though I can’t play the guitar or sing for shit, I still think it is a piece of lyrical genius. The song is still missing a bridge and a one verse, but I thought I would share it. It would be a crime not too. Again, I must advise all people reading the song to read it silently with the voice of Jack Black in your head. Words in all caps are there for emphasis. Use your Jack Black head voice to scream those parts.

The World Will End

by Maxim

It’s a nice nice sunny day

All the animals come to play

With those fuzzy wuzzy tails I want to touch!

 

One comes up close to me

And he says one simple thing

The world is gonna end… you’re gonna DIE!

 

It starts off slow at first with

*The thunder and the lightning

But the next thing you know

You’re  running from RABID BEARS

 

*Chorus*

The world will end

There’s nothing to lose

We all need help

We’re so fucking screwed

 

People running scared

From all those rabid bears

Do not realize that it’s a trap

 

The bears have formed a pact

With the dogs and the cats

And soon that pet chiwawa has your HEAD

 

You thought it was a good idea

To put Snickle fritz on youtube

But little did you know

It has led to your doom.

 

The world will end

There’s nothing to lose

Those dogs are pissed.

We’re so fucking screwed

 

Bob right down the street

Told me something neat

He said that there’s a way to save the earth!

 

He says we must go on a quest

Into the hornet’s nest

And kill that snickle fritz, YES, one and for all!

 

That chiwawa’s a beast

Don’t let his looks deceive you!

He’ll tear out your heart

And turn it to poo!

 

The world will end

There’s nothing to lose

Snickle fritz!!!!!

We’re so fucking screwed

 

 

Thats all I have for now. Makes you wanna step on a couple of chiwawa’s heads doesn’t it? Still got to figure off how to kill of snicklefritz…that bitch.

Cya around, bloggies.

-Maxim