How People Found Me: Top 10

In honor of my twentieth blog post, I’d like to try something a little bit different. Some of you may not know that because we live in a creepy big brother like future, I’m able to track pretty much everything about the people who come here: IP’s (where you’re from), links clicked, who shared my articles, page views, etc. However, the most interesting stat I get is the search engine terms used to reach my blog. Like if you were to to to google and type in “Maxim’s Madness is so AWESOME” into google, and the search results brought you here, that would show up. Since my blog isn’t exactly about normal things, people who get here by through a search engine enter some pretty strange things find their way here. I’ve been compiling a list of the most awesome. I have come up with the best ten. Remember, people actually searched for these things. Enjoy.

“i’m coming after you bro”

I guess this kinda makes sense, since I did advocate for “bros” to “go after” some lulz people. Still funny to me that some angry person would actually search for this.

“arnold fuck you asshole gif”

The thing that this guy was searching for is far better than anything this blog has ever released. Damn right, Arnold!

“i´m sad so i´m gonna cut myself”

This person was depressed. He came here, and I saved his life through joy.

“desperate pee women”

I feel like this person was destined to come to my site. I hope he found what he was looking for. Also, I hope he found this.

“japanese ass”

Yes, we are a porn site. You haven’t found the hidden links yet?? Get going!

“i love an asshole”

Oh, do I love me some asshole.

“god gonna cut ya down”

Goddamn… this guy seriously needs some more lovin’.

“russian mafia dick”

Russian is the best kind. Another secret area of the site. More than enough Russian mafia dicks to go around.

“camille cacnio chinese thief”

I thought she was Thai. Oh well.

“if jesus comes back hang him again”

Who thinks of this crap!? How did he get here!? What the hell!?

And that’s the list. Thanks for twenty great posts! Here’s to twenty more (not likely).

-Maxim

8 thoughts on “How People Found Me: Top 10

  1. I found you because you left a comment on my blog, and I’m glad you did because I really enjoyed your site. Keep up the great posts. It was entertaining. I subscribed as well.

  2. At least once a week I get a search on “gamera” the Japanese turtle monster. So I put gamera in the story as often as possible. I believe in giving people what they want, as long as no children or pets get injured.

  3. Lmfao every single one of those was fucking hilarious. Leaving the Jesus one for last is the perfect choice.

    Here is a lesser list of a few of my own:
    “duck tape ideas”
    “cake pops and more”
    “what is true masculinity”
    “+how not to have friends at work when in management”

    I try.

  4. brilliant. shows perfectly well how strange we get connect nowadays. nice blog. pretty strange things here. looking forward to get more inspired.
    K.

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