The “F” Word and Mad Libs

Anyone who knows me knows I say this word a lot. Maybe a little bit too much. I’ve even had the occasional “stop cussing so much you dumb shit” thrown at me. So what? It’s not my fault. It’s society! I was an innocent boy. I didn’t know anything of this horrid word! I still remember the day I was made to scream the word at the top of my lungs in front of my house, not knowing the poison that had entered me. After that it was all over. The word took over my life.

Now add this glorious word to Mad Libs. If anyone doesn’t remember Mad Libs, it was a game where you would fill in a bunch of random nouns, verbs, adjectives and so on. When you were done, you would then read a short passage, putting in your chosen words in blank spaces for a hilarious outcome. While I was younger we had a bunch of these books lying around, so, armed with my new word, and not knowing what any of the parts of speech meant, would put fuck, and other funny words, into madlibs.

Here is me trying to emulate my mad libs when ten. Libbed words in bold.

Good Stuff

Are you bothered by fuck fuck? Do you feel penishead every day? Does your poop hurt? Then fuckadilly is for you! This turd, fucker treat is chock-full of cock.

Here is what Douche Slaboosh of Dumbass, Montana had to say about fuckadilly. “I start every day with fuckadilly. It’s simply bastard! Even my fucking loves it.”

Don’t delay! Buy fuckadilly today!

Now that was pretty awesome. Though I do have to admit, I have gotten slightly better and mad libs now that I know what a verb is. Here is adult Maxim doing mad libs.

New Year’s Resolutions

It was New Year’s Day, and I was watching penisball on TV with my friends Shirly Fucku, Amanda Huggenkiss, Bob Fart, and Chad Douche.

“Hey, Amanda Huggenkiss,” Bob Fart said, “What is your New Year’s resolution?”

“I am going to learn to play the ass flute,” she said. “Then I am going to play it at nursing homes. I am sure it will make the residents douchy.”

“That’s slutty,” said Shirly Fucku. “I am going to volunteer in a shelter for homeless spectral bats and pistol shrimps. They are so cute. How about you, Bob Fart?”

“I am going to help out around the house,” he said. “Every night, I will put the dildos and the semen in the dishwasher without being asked.”

“I want to improve my grades,” said Chad Douche. “I will study math, science, and fucking every night.”

They all turned to me.

“What is your New Year’s Resolution, Maxim?”

“I’m not making one,” I said. “I’m perfectly black already!”

What do you think? Have I improved? Try doing some yourself. I can assure you, it’s just as funny doing it now as it was back then.


10 thoughts on “The “F” Word and Mad Libs

    • Oh, she reads it. If you think she’d beat you over the head for this, it gets worse. Read “How I Discovered Porn” and think about how your mom would react to that.

  1. This is dangerously close to an Edgar Allen Poe poem I read once, but I prefer your style.

    Very funny, sir.

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